If you missed out on the hastag #BeingFemaleinNigeria trending last week on twitter,
do you live under a rock? don’t worry we’ve round up a few of our favorites. It’s nice to know that we’re not out on an island by ourselves sometimes.
Let’s start with Amma’s top picks:
#BeingAWomanInNigeria You should never have a boyfriend, but be married once u graduate. Like man is d degree u earned.
— V C H E (@OFFICIALUCHEUBA) July 2, 2015
This one is hilarious because it reminds me of the side eye I sometimes get for wanting to go back to school. “So you want degrees but you don’t want children, eh”—ermmm I’ll take both please and thank you.
#BeingAWomanInNigeria means you have the priviledge and opportunity of raising a leader, one unlike all the ones we lament about.
— Ayomide Bada-Francis (@AyomideEedimoyA) July 1, 2015
This one I like because it is positive and it also represents something I am very passionate about. I think the privilege of getting to raise a boy child means bringing someone sensible that all the girls will swoon over because he will be all of the greatest sophisti-ratchet swagged philosophical things I wanted… you are welcome in advance to his wife.
— tjsmart (@tjsmart) July 1, 2015
A bit problematic given my tendencies towards guys younger than me… but ma sakyira.
For some miraculous reason, you are expected to have stronger control over your carnal desires. #BeingAWomanInNigeria
— Mustapha Garko (@Mr_garko) July 1, 2015
This I find HILARIOUS… because I was just talking to a friend about the erectile dysfunction commercials over the airwaves in Ghana and how it is VERY clear that women are not ashamed of their ‘carnal desires’. Here… it is obviously the men who are struggling to keep up. #viagrabeforeviagra #goingtojujumenforstrokegameupgrades #struggleisreal #beingaghanaianman
Here are my picks:
I had a few too many favs, so I have less to say about them and will just let you marinate in their truth instead.
#BeingFemaleInNigeria "Your husband cooked? And you opened your mouth and ate the food? What kind of woman are you?"
— Bibiire o se f'owora (@yew1e) June 30, 2015
#realtears** because I can actually see Ghanaian aunties and moms saying this in their accents.
Seminars everywhere teaching Girls how to be good Wives. Who's teaching the Boys how to be responsible Husbands too? #BeingFemaleInNigeria
— Toyosi Akerele. O. (@toyosirise) June 30, 2015
I’ve been saying this Over and Over and Over again. This emphasis on equipping women to be ‘good spouses’, and somehow thinking that men have this innate ability to know how to love, serve, protect, stay faithful to, be sensitive to and open up to their spouse is beyond me… but this will have to be saved for another time and blog post.
#beingfemaleinNigeria Me: Mom can I repaint my room? Mom: Marry and paint the one in your husband's House.
— Nneka Oyindamola ♥ (@nekkysugar) June 30, 2015
There's always someone feeling sorry for you and promising that "God will do it for you" #beingfemaleinnigeria and single
— Andie Okon (@Andiva) June 30, 2015
When the holidays roll by… when the family functions take place… hell, every damn Sunday.
#BeingFemaleinNigeria When someone says you're smart, 90% of the time it's not a compliment.
— S. (@saratu) June 30, 2015
Afua, you look [fill in the blank with any ordinarily-positive-compliment on brains, beauty and confidence… which somehow doesn’t quite come out as a compliment in the context it is given]
It’s that, or all your relatives will think ‘you’re not taking good care of your husband and home…’
#BeingfemaleinNigeria you're 30 years old? And you wanna leave your boyfriend for cheating? Ordinary cheating? I'm sorry for you. Wa le le.
— Kehinde Diggs (@kooloosaw) June 30, 2015
I had to add this for a friend… #butthat’snoneofmybusiness … chirp … chirp’
#BeingFemaleInNigeria You cant drive an expensive car before you get married, you will scare away men if you do,pretend you don't have money
— Abang! #OpenNASS (@AbangMercy) June 30, 2015
#BeingFemaleInNigeria You are a lady you cant be seen to be too smart, sometimes pretend not to know anything, men like submissive women.
— Abang! #OpenNASS (@AbangMercy) June 30, 2015
These last two I take to heart… because a guy friend politely informed me of the following when I told him I just want a regular guy to approach me, because I’m a regular ol’ gal: ‘afua, when a man sees you out and might want to approach, first he has to contend with the sea of too known repat friends you’re surrounded by, then he’ll be hit with the SERIOUSS slang, then he’ll find out your schooling and job, then he’ll see you driving some car wahh, the apartment and the places you like to frequent…. #massabegonewiththatdesire’
The culture of not seeing females as equals results in men with fragile egos. Always at risk of being 'emasculated' #beingfemaleinNigeria
— Amara Nwankpa (@bubusn) June 30, 2015
Women who are unhappily married trying to make you feel like a failure for being happily single #beingfemaleinNigeria
— Spectra Speaks (@spectraspeaks) June 30, 2015
Word to your mother… and your grandmother.
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** Real tears because I’m laughing so hard that I’m crying